The Duality of Leadership
“Leadership is simple in theory, but difficult in practice. Because leadership is relational and relationships are messy. And, leadership is contextual, and contexts are constantly changing.”
This is a phrase our clients know well.
It’s one we repeat often, and for good reason.
In a Western society flooded with content, our default response when faced with challenges is often to seek information under the belief that if we can just find the “right approach”, the “new tool”, or the most “evidence-based method,” that all of our problems will be solved.
Call it the “silver bullet fallacy” or, if you’re really fancy, “monocausal thinking”, but the allure of this line of thinking is often irresistible, but far from harmless.
The reason we utter this phrase so often is threefold.
We want the leaders we work with to know that leadership is hard.
And, while our expertise across several domains like leadership, executive coaching, and behavioral and performance psychology can help them lead with greater effectiveness, there is nothing we (or any other consultant) can do to change the challenge that is leadership.
But, by orienting back to the relational and contextual nature of leadership, and introducing them to some useful and time-tested (but remarkably simple) principles and practices, we can help them navigate these challenges with greater clarity, precision, and agility.
We want them to embrace and even learn to enjoy the difficulty.
If you are constantly looking for the magic key to unlock all of the doors, you’ll never pour yourself fully into becoming a proficient locksmith.
The most effective leaders are locksmiths - they embrace the challenge of the locked door by becoming increasingly more self-aware through identifying their strengths, values, and tendencies, they become more others-aware through getting to know their people - their strengths, values, and motives, and they become more situationally aware - responding appropriately to situations for the opportunities and challenges they present, rather than wasting time and energy wishing that the situation were different.
When you accept leadership as a relational and contextual endeavor, you learn to love the challenge because the challenge doesn’t mean that you are inadequate or failing, but rather that leadership is, quite simply, challenging.
We want them to see us as curious collaborators and partners in their success rather than expert advisors who will solve all of their problems.
Our process with leaders and teams always begins with the belief that the client is resourceful and capable and that our role is to help them unlock and optimize the skills, talents, and abilities they already possess, thereby increasing their self-reliance.
To be clear, we hold expertise in leadership and organizational effectiveness, and we freely share this expertise with our clients where helpful. But we also recognize that, as consulting, coaching, and training partners outside of their organization, we know far less about their relationships and contexts than they do.
Therefore, we lead with curiosity and a desire to understand, rather than certainty and a desire to impose.
Far too many consultants and poorly labeled coaches position themselves as the hero or rescuer of their clients, which has several adverse effects on the client, including:
Prescribing “ABC solution” that worked at “XYZ company” without taking into account the differences between those instances.
Creating dependency on the consultant such that the organization cannot function without keeping the consultant on retainer.
Short-circuiting the client's learning so that the client “knows the right answers” (rote memorization), but doesn’t know how to use this information effectively (meaningful learning).
The pattern of “simple in theory, but difficult in practice” shouldn’t be new or surprising.
It isn’t just confined to leadership.
In fact, it plays out across almost every aspect of life, from marriage and parenting to personal finance, diet, and exercise.
And yet, far too often, across all of these areas, the allure to find the silver bullet or magic key is incredibly compelling.
So we buy the new dieting app, we attend the new marriage seminar, we buy the latest New York Times bestselling leadership book, and we hire the consultant who promises to fix all of our challenges.
In and of themselves, these are not bad things - in fact, apps, seminars, books, and consultants can be helpful. But, we need to be clear that often the reason they are helpful is that they motivate us to take the steps that we likely knew we needed to take in the first place.
Leadership is simple in theory, and it is difficult in practice.
Whether you’ve overcomplicated the theory to the point of creating noise and confusion, and you need a partner to help you simplify, or you’re overwhelmed by the relational and contextual difficulty, we are here to help.
We would love to walk alongside you to help you create the clarity you need and become more relationally and contextually intelligent - all in the name of self-reliance.
